Last Day Stunt

Luckily Susan saved her latest stunt for the last day of our week alone together. If she had done this on the first day, I might have followed Jeff to the airport and taken a flight to somewhere- anywhere! But she didn’t. She saved the best for last. Susan is smart like that.

Yesterday morning was fairly normal; Susan ate her breakfast while discussing things that were not real. I particularly remember her saying that she had filled out an application for employment somewhere and that she had been asked to go in that morning. I just listened and said things like, “uh-huh” and “oh really.” The ‘professionals’ have said to play along, so I did.

I don’t know why I listened to that advice this time. Over and over again, this advice has proven not to work in Susan’s case. Probably because she is so strong willed. She does not give up once her mind is set. I repeat: Susan does not give up until she chooses to, never ever!

I had a business call and as I chatted about details I saw Susan walk through the hallway with her purse and shoes! RED ALERT! She bid me good-bye from across the room. I hurried the person on the other end of the call. Slam! Susan was out the front door! I wrapped up the call and ran for my shoes, cell phone, car keys and camera. Those are the items I have regretted not having on other such little chases. That is, me chasing Susan as she determinedly stammers her way around my neighborhood.

On this day, Susan walked to the end of my driveway, turned left, walked down the road to the stop sign and turned right. I would say she is familiar with this route, but she is not familiar with much of anything these days, so I will just say that she has chosen this route several times in the past two years. Shoes on, I ran to my car and followed her at a distance (snapping pictures along the way, as usual).

Eventually I decided to pass her by and turn around at the nearby dead end. That way she could be independent for about two more minutes before I picked her up on the way back. After doing a 180 in the car, Susan was nowhere in sight! What! Had she fallen into a ditch? I drove frantically toward where I had last seen her walking! There she was – heading up a steep driveway toward a house on a hill!


“Susan, get in this car!” I demanded. She ignored me at first and I kept demanding louder and louder. Finally she gave me the ‘I’ve got this under control nod’ while waving me to wait for her. She walked onward and upward. “Susan, no!" I yelled in a desperate raspy voice. She just nodded and waved again as she confidentially approached the house!

One thing about living in the Oklahoma country is that you hardly know your neighbors; how could you when you hardly even see them. I knew the young couple who had originally built this house. It had sold several times since then. I had absolutely no idea who resided inside that door that Susan was now knocking unrelenting on. No Answer. ‘Whew!’ I thought. But Susan would not give up; there was another door on the side. She knocked on it a while.


I sat in my car at the bottom of the hill watching Susan. If I didn't know better, I might think she really did know where she was and what she was doing. I sat alone in my car, not knowing if I should laugh about this whole thing or just cry. Instead,I just snapped more pictures to prove to somebody else this really happened.

“Susan. Just come on!”I again pleaded. She gave me one last defiant look before she walked back across the front porch and to the front door again! She began knocking as though they might not have heard all her other knocks. To my surprise, this time the door crept partly open! Inside, I saw a round head and scantily dressed male trying to shoo Susan from his presence.

I jumped from the car, ran to Susan’s side and whispered that she better get herself in my car before she gets herself killed! I meant it. I moved toward the shadow at the door where I saw a full body tattoo and shaved head trying to avoid me. How funny, how could he avoid me? We were the ones that came to his unwelcoming door. I expressed my sorrow for the interruption and informed him that Susan was just confused.

I did not even want to know what we had interrupted. As I backed my car down the long steep winding driveway, I lectured Susan as to the danger she had put us in. “But that was the office, Karen. I paid my rent. I’ve been there before.” She insisted. Informing her that we don’t pay rent, that is not an office, and she lives with Jeff and Me didn’t seem to register. She was tired and needed to go home and have a nap! A nap- that sounded like a wonderful idea to me! It had been a long week; but Jeff would be home tomorrow!