Wine and Whine

Here I lie crumpled in a corner of my bedroom with a glass of red wine in one hand and the other hand pounding on the keys of my computer. Who else wants to hear me wine- I mean whine. I’m not sitting here hoping to relax and wind down as I might on another evening, no- not so fast! My hope is solely to calm my nerves and chill- just chill! Am I asking too much? If I can achieve that goal then perhaps I can proceed to the other. I’m guessing you want to know why I’m shaking and why I am having a glass of wine on a Tuesday evening at barely six-thirty PM. And if I am wrong, that is, if you aren’t wondering or perhaps don’t care-oops.

Susan. Need I say more?

Jeff is on a business trip (lucky him) and I am here, Susan and me. She woke up confused. She had lost her keys between going to bed and waking up. And of course, it wasn’t her fault- it was someone else’s. But there is no one else, I explained in vain. I attempted a normal day, in spite of Susan’s key crisis. We went to get groceries, prepared meals, and had the usual visit from the nurse. Lawanda, Susan’s nurse, was amused by Susan’s feisty spirit. The language she heard today was certainly not what she was expecting on her routine visit, I am sure. She documented Susan’s attempts to ‘go home’ and her restlessness. Upon leaving she bid me good luck and expressed her concerns about the rest of my day.

But I was optimistic. We would go ahead with our plans to accompany Kiara to look at fabric for curtains for my new guest room. Something to look forward to- yes! Susan, on the other hand, thought our outing was about getting her a new key made- for her red vehicle. Getting to Kiara’s and getting to the store with Kiara was all but peaceful; with Susan in the back directing us to the dealership and complaining when we didn’t obey her orders.



Obviously, if I had the ability to forsee the future I wouldn’t have attempted the trip. Trust me on this one. If I had known that Susan would scream and yell and abuse and accuse both Kiara and I all over the store in an aggressive psychotic manner like I have never before witnessed, yup, believe me- the trip would have been cancelled. But, I didn’t have that foresight and therefore was caught awkwardly defending Kiara and myself in public before a rather concerned audience.

Oh no, don’t get me wrong- they were not sympathetic for the plight of Kiara or myself. No, they eyeballed Kiara and I with judgment and suspicion while sweet little victimized Susan yelled about how we had stolen her car that she had just bought! I begged her to quiet down and told her she was creating a spectacle. All the while she screamed back, so sure she was right, “Come on now, let’s go! Give me my car back! I will not be quiet! You are just ashamed because you are hiding my car from me. What kind of a human being are you? Stealing my car and my keys right after I bought it?….”

If you listen closely, surely you can hear me begging , “Lower your voice, Susan! Stop it! You are imagining all of this!” And when she kept coming at me like a rabid bulldog, I resorted to, “You are seventy- three years old, Susan! You don’t have a driver’s license! There is no red car! You must stop!” My attempt at firmness only made her firmer- delusionally firmer!

Lest I dare forget, let me give a 'shout out' to all our on-lookers who circled and hovered and eyeballed Kiara and I, as they seemed to be trying to decipher if and when to intervene on Susan’s behalf. I mean, seriously, her frail little self was accusing us of stealing her car in the parking lot. What were they supposed to think? If it were myself in their shopping shoes, I too would want to ensure the protection of this vulnerable upset elderly woman. So kudos to the strangers!

But hey! What about Kiara and myself!?! Who would protect us? And by the way, in case you are wondering, the answer is YES. Yes, security was called before it was all over with. Kiara was forced to escort Susan to the car while I attempted an explanation of Susan’s condition to skeptical store employees.

In the parking lot, I found Kiara attempting to coax Susan into my suburban and an equally upset Susan refusing to budge. After all, she knew she had driven her new red car there and that is what she(damn sure!!) was going to leave in! I wanted her to leave in her own vehicle too- trust me on this one.

After a long fight, we drove home with Susan kicking up a fuss in the back seat. After dropping Kiara back off at her home, Susan and I continued the conflicted trip on to our own home. That is where I fed her again while attempting to ignore her continued accusations about me stealing her purse and keys along with other such verbal abuses involving my character and integrity. Finally it was more then enough and Susan found herself deposited into her area of the house. As for me- well, you know where I am now.